“You’ve got to stop worrying about growing old, and start worrying about growing up!” – Dennis Hopper in the film Elegy
A big part of growing up is taking full responsibility for your own life and the choices you make today.
Blaming your parents, your genetics or our culture can only take you so far. You are still stuck with yourself. Wherever you go, there you are. Do you like who you are? If not, then change it. I’m not here to say it’s easy, I’m just here to say it’s do-able.
The reason I loved this quote from Dennis Hopper is that it encapsulates much of my own thinking about midlife. Unless we die soon, we will all grow old. There is no question of that.
But will we ever grow up? Will we transform ourselves into the kind of mature older adults (elders) we can be proud of, ones who take responsibility for all of our own actions? Elders of wisdom and vision who can help guide the young as they struggle in this confusing world? Can we make ourselves a part of the solutions, instead of contributing to the problems of this world?
I say we can, and it all starts at home. I see so many out there trying to change the world when they can’t even change themselves. It’s true, you can’t change your past, but your future is totally up to you.
So, what’s it going to be? What could you do right now to choose a different future for yourself? How could you make a conscious effort to let go of just about all of your past baggage and move on? This moment is all we have for sure. Do it now!
August 13, 2008 at 6:27 pm
The only reason I want to see this film is because of Dennis Hopper. I mean I already have him telling me what to do in my car. I just got his voice from Navtones.com where you can download celebrity voices to your GPS.
Dennis Hopper is a wise man
August 14, 2008 at 2:00 pm
I see this maturity issue raise it’s head every day. All the expectations and behavior patterning we’ve picked up over the years from our family, teachers, society and advertising. It’s overwhelmimg. It often takes a lifetime to sort through them all, deciding which ones hold true for us and which ones belong to others or a different time.
I believe this must be what Jung meant by “self actualization”. Sifting through the debris to discover what you truly value, what has meaning in your Life.
It might be the only true reason why we are here.
“It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, it is not possible to find it elsewhere” Agnes Repplier
Enjoy the Journey
Brad
August 14, 2008 at 11:22 pm
You make some profound points. Taking responsibility for your own life is indeed a prerequisite for spiritual growth. I spent so many of my married years resisting that responsibility and looking to change others instead. When in middle age things fell apart I was forced to face the fact that the only person’s life that I had any power to change was my own.
I must say I haven’t found it easy. But then nothing worthwhile ever is. Your blog’s inspirational by the way.
August 20, 2008 at 1:15 am
Gee, this rings a bell. My post today on Quotesqueen used this quote: “You can’t do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth.” ~Shira Tehrani